April 23, 2014

Impulsivity is defined as a tendency to react to stimuli in a rapid, unplanned fashion without allowing time for complete processing of information. Impulsive behavior has been shown to be associated with decreased sensitivity to negative consequences of behavior and a lack of regard for long-term consequences. – Google “define: impulsivity”

Such an interesting definition…

As a seemingly indirect thought entered my mind this evening on “impulsivity”, I merely googled the term to gain a perspective on this concept.

I have been deeply deeply troubled in my heart and spirit of late on a variety of issues. I suppose that’s why I’ve written less and less on here. Most people don’t enjoy hearing the contents of a troubled heart. Some would say it’s demoralizing or discouraging, especially in a society that supports an illusion of ‘positive thinking’ which is usually nothing more than patronization.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m a fan of optimism and thinking positively as opposed to negatively… yet, I’m beginning to realize now that this has it’s proper place under the submission of Jesus Christ and should not be separated from Him. As if a psychological theory is truth outside of Christ… I think not. But this is a whole different issue I won’t go into at present.

So few of us enjoy the conflict… we’re creatures of comfort. So to share the deep and controversial stuff that has gotten laid on my heart these days isn’t fun. No fluffy kittens and butterflies, pretty sunsets and rainbows! It’s the beautiful conflict kind of stuff… the make waves, dangerous lightning bolts, thunderclap kind of stuff. Even then though, it’s the weak versions, because I know God knows my heart well enough to not lay the truly burdensome stuff on me all at once… I’d be crushed by the weight of it all. I sense and have the knowledge that there’s more to come and He’s just training me little bits at a time for when it really hits.

Back to the impulsivity though…

Well, in this current culture and generation, we’ve grown accustom to a pattern of behavior that underlies our very way of functioning. It’s creeped in so inconspicuously that we adopted it without even knowing. I guess that’s like a lot of stuff though. We don’t question or take into account what’s real or unreal anymore because we’re so inundated with information galore, we have little time to differentiate between the two.

The internet and information age.

This interconnected network of systems has reprogrammed everything from our minds to how we conduct relationship to our sleeping habits and everything in between. And I know I’ve touched a little bit on this on here, but I haven’t delved in as deep as I know I could… but that is to spare the reader excessive amounts of details and soap box theories that might trigger an onset of irritation and the cascade of defensive justifications. Stirring up conflict and controversy is not my forte or ever my goal… I’m a creature built and hard-wired to share and bring comfort. That’s part of what God has called me into – to help carry the burdens of the broken, and act as a vessel to show His soothing mercy and gentleness…

But lately, He’s also given me an awareness of my enabling tendencies and my “keep quiet” default and where this is not always healthy or honoring of Him or the person/people I desire to serve. He is still working on the balance with me though, so I’m not sure where He’s going with this.

Maybe He’s just convicting me personally and making deep connections between my haphazard behaviors to the information age I live in. I’m beginning to recognize though just how impulse I have been throughout my life and the contributing factors like the internet are not excuses or things to pass the blame on… they just expose my heart condition.

Is impulsivity bad?

I’m in the process, as of this evening, of exploring this concept… to seek God’s heart on why He brought it to my attention and where His truth is on this topic. I could articulate about a hundred opinions and logically analyze it. Even tie it all into the internet, societal, mental, emotional areas… but I won’t do that just yet, because I want to hear what the Lord has to say instead of me defaulting to my typical realm of reasoning.

I guess I just write this out to get it out tonight… because I have far too much bombarding my mind these days, I had to get at least one tiny element off my chest. There may not be any consonance to this blog post, but perhaps it will inspire someone to stop and take a moment to evaluate and check their heart. I think that’s what that “seemingly indirect” thought on impulsivity may have done for me… so that’s where I’m at.

But you, Lord, are a compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness. – Psalm 86:15

To be continued…..